paleogymnast (paleogymnast) wrote,

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Sam Never Understood (Fanfic)

Title: Sam Never Understood

Fandom: Supernatural

Characters: Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester

Pairings: none

Rating: PG

Word Count: 268

Warnings: none

A/N: Just a little drabble. Thanks to

engel82  for the beta. I've got more fic coming (lots and lots in process), but I've had my head burried in law school text books for the last month, so I'm just happy to have the time to post something! Cross-posted to sn_fic  and dean_sam.
Disclaimer: I own nothing and no money is being made, no copyright infringement intended! "Supernatural" and its characters are owned by Eric Kripke, Warner Brothers, the CW network, et al. This is fiction written entirely for entertainment purposes only. Not mine; don't sue, please. I repeat: not mine.

Summary: Sam never understood why Dean sold his soul, but to Dean that didn't really matter.


Sam never understood why Dean made the deal.

Not really. Sam was stronger, and he was more capable of moving on, of dealing; with life; with being alone. Sam would never believe him, but Dean knew. Sam didn’t know that for Dean, life without Sam was hell. Failing to save Sam, to save his life, was hell. Dean could have followed Sam, but Sam would have still been dead, and there would be no guarantees on where Dean would go, and he no matter where he went, Dean knew that he would not escape the failure of Sam’s death. What difference could it possibly make to Dean if his hell was on earth or in hell itself? Either way he failed; he lost; they won; and Dean’s whole life didn’t mean a thing. At least this way… Sam lived. Dean didn’t live, and Dean got a one year reprieve from hell—one year to feel everything, to see the fruits of his success, to know, to believe, and to comprehend the truth that the demons would never be able to take from him. He had won. And not even an eternity in hell could take that from him. He wished he could be there to watch the rest of Sam’s life, and he hoped that maybe someday Sam would understand. But even if he never knew anything of Sam’s existence beyond the moment his year was up, and even if Sam never forgave him and never understood, it was all worth it. And with that truth; they might own Dean’s soul, but no demon would ever own him.
Tags: angst, characterstudy, dean'spov, drabble, fic, pg, supernatural
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